I usually like to blog about a principle or experience that has given me more meaning in life or an improvement of what life has to offer. I like to write about hiking, fitness, gratitude, self-care, discipline, energy, relationships, and making a plan for your health, wealth, and well-being. I write about growing experiences that have changed my life hopefully leaving you educated and motivated to make some positive changes in your own lives. Not gonna happen today.
Today I’m using this platform as therapy. Therapy to express and release my frustrations at this day and the shit we all seem to have to deal with on an ongoing and neverending basis. Most of the time I (we) seem to be able to handle a certain amount of frustration, aggravation, pain, and disappointment. We go about our days thinking we have it all figured out and that we can handle the bumps in the road that come before our victories. These “bumps” are really what make the victories seem worth it.
But sometimes it just seems the world, the universe, or God is just taking a big old dump on top of us just to see how we react. Sometimes it’s a compounding of 100 little things and one more thing causes us to go into a tailspin for no apparent reason to the people around us. Sometimes it’s something we fear the most rearing it's stupid, ugly head trying to make us think we are doomed forever. The fear of the unknown is really how I define fear. Fear is just the unknown.
We should actually become familiar with and make friends with fear so it does has such a powerful effect on our choices. As a matter of fact, I really put a lot of effort into making sure my body, emotions, mind, and heart are functioning together and optimally. I meditate, affirm, take multiple outside walks a day, exercise 6 days per week, fast consistently, and regulate all the fun stuff I like to do like eating junk food and drinking alcohol. I’m constantly reading books on psychology, physiology, and lots of other “ologies” that make me and those around me better. I even teach all this shit to my clients so that they can live better/happier lives.
I make sure I stretch after workouts, I get to bed at a decent hour, I limit my alcohol consumption to the weekends and I’m even on a pitch (drink) count. 90% of the time I feel like I’m in control of the things I’m able to control, which is my response to the stuff that life throws at us.
Then there’s that 10%. That 10% where you just don’t give a shit. That 10% where if one more fucking thing goes wrong, you are going to lose your mind. That 10% where life doesn’t seem fair and it seems like all the terrible things happen to the good people. That 10% where you just want to be angry and you're not even sure why or how to direct your anger. That 10% where you are just waiting for someone to do one more thing so you are justified in going off the rails. I’m pretty sure we have all been and going to experience this feeling over and over again throughout our lives. Or it could be just me….
So, what do we do about it? What can we do about it? Is this feeling part of our growth, success, and ultimately happiness? Are we wrong and everyone else is right, or vice-versa, or none of the above? Can we flip a switch or do we just have to ride it out? Does having “One Of Those Days” mean exactly that, just one of those days?
Wouldn’t you know it, I have a few principles that may help us get out of the suck and back on top of our game. Principles that are just now bubbling to the surface of my memory as I try to pull myself out of this ditch described above.
We don’t see the world as it is, we see the world as we are. Our perception of the world is and will always be tainted or filtered through our thoughts, environment, past history, and experiences. The quicker we realize that, the quicker we can start thinking and responding more logically.
Focus on the Gain and stay out of the Gap. Gap thinking is when you focus on the part of life that didn’t work the way you thought or wanted. Focusing on the Gain is when you focus your energy on how far you have come. The one way of thinking (the Gap) puts you in a negative mindset stunting your further growth and future happiness. The other way (the Gain) put you in a positive headspace that is fertile for growth. A perfect example is the person who sets out to lose 20lbs in 6 months. At the 6-month mark, they have lost 16lbs. Gap Thinking focuses on not reaching the goal and beating yourself up over it. Gain Thinking focuses on the weight you did lose and how you feel, look and perform better than before.
The view is so much better when you pull your head out of your ass. Not much to explain here.
There you have it, folks! Advice from the hypocrite struggling to keep himself sane and above water. I must admit that just writing my frustrations down and writing down those principles I know to be true has made me feel considerably more positive. I think I need to add a 4th bullet.
Getting what’s going on inside of you on the outside of you is vital to moving past Just One Of Those Days. Not as short and clever as the other bullets, but you get the point.